Open Letter to Move-On.org

Although my participation in the Obama campaign was minimal (small donation, phone calls, door knocking) I am inspired by this campaign and would like to offer some ideas of how to continue the momentum throughout President Obama’s term in office. You may have already thought of these things because you’re way ahead of me, but last night’s history-making election results move me to respond in some way.

I also just finished reading Naomi Klein’s book, The Shock Doctrine, showing how since the Reagan administration, economist Milton Freidman’s policies have taken away the rights of the common person and given everything to big business, the lobbyists, Congress, and the Washington insiders. These are very strong entities who are already trying to influence the Obama White House. We need a grass-roots organization to support President Obama and use nonviolent protests, teach-ins, and rallies to communicate to these entities that we want change and will no longer sit back and let business as usual steamroll over our lives.

I realize that you already know this, but I just have to say it for my own benefit, I guess. We need to continue the momentum started during the campaign and show President Obama that we support him and his policies. Here are my suggestions:

1. I heard that there were about 700 campaign offices throughout the US helping to make these results happen. Let’s keep them open as community grass-roots organization posts where new proposals coming from the Obama presidency can be explained and supported.
2. Let’s use our grass-roots offices to picket the offices of big business, the lobbyists, Congress, and the Washington insiders to show them that they need to change their ways and show the country that their businesses will no longer run this country.
3. Let’s use our grass-roots offices to keep young people engaged in the political process and develop their own skills in organizing, working, and promoting President Obama’s policies to make his promises a reality. Yes, we can!
4. On two occasions, I received a robo-call from Michele Obama asking me to support Barack’s campaign. She has a very sweet but compelling voice. Let’s ask her to continue to call us when President Obama needs extra support to move one of his proposals through Congress. I would do anything she asks.

President Obama and his cabinet cannot do it alone. They will need our support in order to keep moving in the direction of change. They also will need people with foresight and common sense to help keep to the middle way where excesses in either direction toward the left or right will weaken our democracy. That’s why we need everyone to work toward realizing our dream. Yes we can!

An Open Letter to the Candidates and the Media

I don’t want to hear about the vice presidential candidates. I don’t want to hear about the candidates’ wives. I don’t want to hear about who is the bigger change agent. I don’t want to hear how much money the lobbyists are paying the candidates to campaign for their special interests. I want to know what the candidates’ platforms are.

The elevator stops at each floor. If you think you can effect change, then tell me what that means. Where will you start and where will you stop?

I want to know what you think you can do in the next four years to make this world a better place for its inhabitants including the fish in the sea, birds in the air and living things on the ground.
Tell me how you will improve our lives with all that money the lobbyists are giving you.
What are you going to do about global warming?
What are you going to do to promote health and welfare including preventing untimely deaths due to war, poverty, disease, drug addiction, alcoholism, and man’s inhumanity to man? Down here in the trenches, these issues concern us.

I realize that a president is not a magician. Don’t try to convince me otherwise. Just let me know what you are going to do in the next four years to create life on this globe that's a little bit better than it is now.

Tired

I’m tired of the political campaign, the rhetoric, and the assumptions the news media makes. So here’s a little funny I ran across by Jeffrey Shaffer in his article “How to revive a campaign” in the Christian Science Monitor on Sept. 5:

“My opponent was overheard at a party telling lobbyists for the oil industry that he opposes offshore drilling because he fears it will awaken giant subterranean reptiles that will run amok, destroy our cities, and drain the military budget.” And “My opponent has bragged repeatedly that he gets his ideas about economics by listening to old Led Zeppelin records played backwards.”

How about coming up with more funnies to help lighten the campaign bluster?

Joe Biden - reformed plagiarist?

I am disappointed that Obama selected Biden for his vice presidential running mate. As an English teacher, I warned my students about plagiarism using Biden as an example of how it can haunt the person years later. Maybe it no longer haunts Biden and he’s a reformed plagiarist. However, even when people who drink excessively stop drinking they still call themselves alcoholics. If he’s not plagiarizing, my guess is that he’s doing something else that’s equally dishonest. I don’t trust him and I don’t think I would like to see him step in as president if Obama couldn’t serve.

Maybe as my son-in-law suggested, I should just give him a chance. But I have misgivings. How important is it that he might be the next vice president? Is it fair to disparage him or is it fair to make analogies that compare plagiarism to other fraudulent activities? If I look for his highest life condition, remembering that each of us reside in the Ten Worlds from Hell to Buddhahood, then I have to ignore his earlier transgressions and trust that he has overcome them.

But I also have a responsibility to face reality.

As a writer, I think that stealing someone’s words is the same as stealing their TV, stereo system, or car. Maybe even more serious because it misappropriates the thoughts created by another person.

If I invented a new system of energy transmission that solved the energy crisis and someone else called it his own, I could feel violated, or I could be willing to share it with the world like with open source programming. So maybe plagiarism only becomes a violation depending on the attitude of the victim. But even with open source, even though everyone shares, someone gets credit for his work. They just let others use what they created. That’s different.

So I still believe that a person who plagiarizes is stealing by not giving credit to the source. And I also think that a person who plagiarizes and thinks he’s overcome that affliction is still going to have the urge to take from others if not their words, then their ideas, their rights, or their possessions.

I'm a Whining Victim

I’m going to whine. After the previous blog where I criticized whiners, I’m going to whine. I love words. I love to play Scrabulous and now Facebook put it down.

What am I going to do? I thought about creating my own word game to play with my friends. But that might take some effort. So all I can do is whine.

What if I started a petition to the makers of Scrabble to get over their fear of losing profits and accept that Scrabulous only motivates people to purchase their product? Appeal to their baser instincts of greed, anger and foolishness. For what else would motivate a giant corporation to sue another corporation?

Maybe I need to find other pursuits that don’t fill the pockets of greedy corporate giants.

Autocorrect or Intuitive Responding

Whenever I want to write my blog, I start out writing “I don’t know what to write” repeatedly until I think of something to write. I finished my to do list today except for writing this blog but I don’t know what to write. I keep misspelling what, but my auto correct feature corrects me. That’s nice. How about auto correct every time we make a misstep. How would that work? Well, when I put my foot in my mouth, autocorrect would erase the blunder and make something more appropriate come out of my mouth.

I guess the GPS has an auto correct so if you make the wrong turn, GPS can recalibrate the trip and guide you back to your route.

What about procrastination? How many times do I have to remind myself to do something that’s waiting to get done? Would autocorrect put me smack in front of the task and keep me frozen there until I did it? What about when I want to do something but shouldn’t? Like it would be a big mistake if I started smoking pot. But never having done it, I might want to try before I die. What keeps me from doing it? Worry about getting caught? I don’t think that motivates users negatively. Not enough money? Again, not a big deterrent. My conscience? Not so great there either.

I guess I’m better at not doing things than I am at doing things. I wonder why that is? Some people are just the opposite. They spend, spend, spend, or eat, eat, eat and can’t put on the brakes. I don’t have a problem with that. My problem is with do, do, do what must get done in order to get to the next place. Is it a failure phobia or success phobia?

What’s the difference between eat, eat, eat and procrastinate, procrastinate, procrastinate? One puts things in and the other avoids putting things out.

But I have no trouble with elimination. And that’s putting out, I think. I do that a lot.

So do I have a behavior disorder related to holding back? If I gave out more, I would have diarrhea constantly. I just overcame that behavior. So now I’m struggling with the opposite, but I’m not constipated.

Maybe I’m not really procrastinating. Maybe I’m just being true to my theory that I have to wait until the time is right and I use my intuition to feel that it’s the right time. So is that why I don’t take action until the time is right?

Does this mean that I’m healthy? That I’m doing the right thing? That chanting puts me on the right path? That I’m beating myself up over nothing? That I don’t need autocorrect to motivate me to do the right thing? I’m already doing it.

Reframe Bullying, Achieve Goals

Do you avoid being alone? Do you keep yourself busy so that you don’t feel the space of aloneness crowding in on you? Do you substitute feeling alone with drugs or alcohol? I received a book to review that spent the first two-thirds of its verbiage on bemoaning the sad life of self–absorbed women victims of misguided parents, friends, relatives, sick uncles, alcoholics, self-absorbed partners and employers.

I’m a compassionate person, but after reading 150 pages relating events about these sad, desperate people, I’m feeling burned out. Within these pages, I found two solutions to this sorry state of aloneness: become more self-absorbed by finding your life force, and return to your secret garden. Granted, there are still about a hundred pages left, but I don’t think I can endure the potential for self-absorption much longer.

I am reminded of a time when my daughter, Debbie, started playing clarinet. Yes, the first year of playing an instrument can be difficult for the listeners, but Debbie had a natural musical talent and in the spring of that first year, she was preparing for her fifth-grade band concert, soloing with “Pop! Goes the Weasel” and adding her own little improvisation to the end of the tune. She decided one beautiful day to practice outside on the side porch.

As she practiced, our neighbor walked by and said, “Debbie, you sound like a sick cow!” I heard the comment and waited for Debbie’s response. Debbie continued to practice and when she finished and came back inside, she said, “Mom, I think our neighbor doesn’t feel very good about herself.” She played beautifully in her concert and continued to study clarinet and is now an accomplished clarinetist with a doctorate in clarinet performance. Had she been one of those self-absorbed victims, I shudder to think what might have become of her. But rather, she saw through our neighbor’s ugly comment and labeled it low-self esteem instead of a personal attack.

Although I understand that there may be people in this world who suffer at the hands of bullies, abusers, inept parents, and others, I’m sorry to say that this book I’m reading probably does not offer the solution to their pain.

Grit Gets Me out of My Slump

I’m in a slump as can be seen by the dearth of entries in this blog. What is in my way? For the past several months, I have been feeling at loose ends, not focused, starting and not finishing projects, setting goals and failing to follow through on many of them. Being self-employed I sabotage my own ambitions by wanting to spend more time playing Scrabulous on Facebook than on anything else on my to-do list. I’m good at Scrabulous and I’ve won all the games I have played so far (which isn’t all that many) but all I really want to do is play Scrabulous and win, win, win. Maybe there should be an Olympic Scrabulous event.

What is it about the psychology of winning? Why do we want to win? To show that we’re better than others? Better than the best? What is so important about winning? Why do I like it when my score is higher than my opponents? It makes me feel good about myself, yes. Is that it? Does it make me feel less about others? No. I appreciate their wanting to play. But I’m afraid that if I win too much, they won’t want to play anymore. But I don’t want to cheat just to let them win. That’s why I was wondering whether I could play Scrabulous solitaire. But that would not be as much fun because of the social interaction. So do I let up a little or try to win? If someone lets up a little and lets me win, would I like it better than losing? No. I wouldn’t like the absence of a challenge.

So to figure out the answers to these questions, I Googled “the psychology of winning” and found an article in Psychology Today Magazine by Peter Doskoch called “The Winning Edge.” In it he outlines several qualities of people of average intelligence who accomplish their goals to solve difficult mathematical problems or get good grades in school. These qualities like grit, passion, ambition, self-discipline, optimism, and persistence comprise the winning edge. In addition Doskoch says, “Truly gritty people, however, tend to set especially challenging long-term goals” like the mathematician who spent ten years working on proving a theory as opposed to those who fail to show grit. And concerning getting good grades, he says, “The data demonstrate the need for parents and teachers to praise effort rather than ability.” It’s not how smart people are, it’s how much effort they put into achieving their goals.

So winning has nothing to do with besting someone else. It has to do with setting a goal and focused effort toward accomplishing it that might mean indirectly being better than someone else, but mostly it means achieving a personal goal to have a better time, get a higher score, of make longer, higher point words. So it looks like I have substituted playing Scrabulous for accomplishing my goals.

Does that get me out of my slump? It helps me see that without persistence, passion, self-discipline, ambition, optimism and grit, I’m not going to achieve my goals. Maybe that’s all I need to get started again on my goal of selling ten books a day, writing eight articles a month, earning more money, and starting an investment portfolio.

Source:
Doskoch, Peter. “The Winning Edge.” Psychology Today Magazine. Nov/Dec 2005.

Learning from History

What if someone told you that you had to change your religion? Would you do it?

For more than twenty years during the Middle Ages, a king in Europe battled a group of people to force them to become Christian. They resisted and he brought his armies back three times, killing, burning their places of worship, building his own churches, and replacing their priests with his.

Charlemagne (king Charles) thought that his religion was better than the religions people practiced during his reign so he tried to force them to become Christians. Not everyone thought this was a good idea, so they resisted even though it might cost them their lives. Some of those religions survived Charlemagne’s attacks, but many died out due to the pressure he put on them.

One of the ways people resisted was by building castles. Many of these castles in Europe and the Middle East were constructed to prevent Christians from invading their lands during the Crusades. Muslims, Pagans, Druids, and other religious people tried to protect their religions and their people from being forced to adopt Christianity.

After the Christian invaders defeated the castle owners, they still had to defend themselves from attack from other enemies who wanted their land. These enemies and their greed for more land, because it equaled more power, tried to defeat the Christians and take their castles. In some castles, we can find both churches and mosques because of the many times they changed hands. In Spain, many synagogues and mosques were converted into Christian churches when Queen Isabella ruled Spain and the Jewish and Muslim features of these buildings remain today.

When unbiased researchers look at history, many atrocities emerge that had their origins in human characteristics of greed, anger, and foolishness. As related above, greed makes people want to have things that other people own, just because they want more wealth, power, or food. In today’s events we can see the same force causing people to attack and subdue other people due to these goals.

Anger shows in history when one leader wants to take revenge on another for past offenses or simply to show that he’s stronger, or better than someone else. Anger comes from a desire to punish others, often due to a lack of understanding. In today’s world, the attack on September 11th stemmed from anger at the US. Then the US attacked Afghanistan and Iraq to retaliate for that attack. Then suicide bombers attack others to retaliate for these military actions. And the vicious cycle of anger continues unabated as we also see in the Israeli-Palestinian conflict.

Foolishness results from a lack of good judgment. Charlemagne’s actions in the Middle Ages could be described as foolish as his ignorance of other religions made him believe that they were inferior to his. Whenever someone acts out of foolishness, it often stems from ignorance, fear of the unknown, or a lack of compassion.

Greed, anger, and foolishness lead to much suffering. Maybe our prayer should be to apologize for these actions, rather than to fulfill our selfish desires for our daily bread.

Where is peace?

Let's start a dialogue about where and how you find peace?

Here are some places where I find peace:

In the garden
After lovemaking
On the bus
At the park
When I chant
When I accept
When I refrain from rising to a challenge

Another four years of Bush?

Take the Bush/McCain challenge. Do you think they are fundamentally different or the same? Take this online quiz and find out how much you know about McCain and Bush.

http://Bush-McCainChallenge.com/?rc=challenge-friends&r_id=12560-6237936-Ja6xpw

Breaking the Bipolar Barrier

Just reading the table of contents in Marya Hornbacher’s book, Madness: A Bipolar Life, offers the reader some insight into the world of bipolar illness – “Depression,” “Meltdown,” “Escapes,” “Hypomania,” “The Diagnosis,” “Losing It,” “Hospitalization #1,” “Hospitalization #6,” “Release.” The nature of bipolar disorder and schizophrenia makes the illness worse by the vicious cycle of paranoia, pain, and insanity that cause the suffering person do everything to sabotage her treatment, or as Hornbacher says, “…how to make sure that you’ll be getting crazier by the day.” So when her psychiatrist says, don’t drink alcoholic beverages, keep a routine, eat healthy, take the meds and so on, Hornbacher does just the opposite. Not because she’s intentionally trying to disregard her doctor's advice, but because her manic episodes and the voices in her head tell her that she’s okay, while the depressive episodes prevent her from taking any action at all.

Confounding all this confusion, the quality of care also takes its toll on her mental state as the emergency room doctors sometimes make medical decisions that oppose her own doctor’s treatment plan. In a sad, but amusing account Hornbacher patiently explains to the hospital psychiatrist that she’s not depressed, but coming off a manic episode. The psychiatrist decides to increase her antidepressant medication and sleeping pills. When Hornbacher argues that she’s an addict and can’t take the medication the doctor prescribes, the doctor says, “I’m sure you won’t start abusing it.” Nothing Hornbacher says can convince the doctor to follow the regimen prescribed by her own doctor.

Hornbacher’s account of her heroic struggles to escape from the insanity of bipolar disorder and her honesty and insight into her bizarre behaviors makes a fast-paced, gut-wrenching story that causes the reader to not only better understand those who suffer from this illness, but cheer with the hope that Hornbacher expresses when she experiences good results as she strives to take her medications, exercise, do yoga, use light therapy, participate in group therapy sessions, and listen to her therapist. Whether she can maintain this tenuous balance depends upon whether she can keep her swinging moods under control.

A brilliant writer, Hornbacher chronicles the often humorous but sad episodes of a person with bipolar disorder. In her manic episodes, she’s a university teacher, a writer, and a lecturer doing a hundred and one different things all at once, while drunk, on medication, with little or no sleep. With insight she says, “That I have made it all this way without dying or killing myself or someone else is a miracle, or a joke.” But it’s no joke that she has successfully chronicled an illness that has contributed to her brilliance as well as her sufferings in a way that allows the reader to understand and feel compassion for those who have been afflicted with bipolar disorder, and offers direction to those who might help.

Marya Hornbacher is the author of the Pulitzer Prize-nominated national bestseller Wasted: A Memoir of Anorexia and Bulimia, a book that remains an intensely read classic, and of the acclaimed novel The Center of Winter. An award-winning journalist, she lectures nationally on writing and mental health and lives with her husband in Minneapolis, Minnesota.

Madness: A Bipolar Life
Marya Hornbacher
Houghton Mifflin
222 Berkeley Street
Boston, MA 02116
2008
ISBN: 978-0-618-75445-8
$25.00

From SaveDarfur.org

If you were invited to a party hosted by the enablers of the
genocide of hundreds of thousands of innocent civilians, would
you go?

Today, as the Olympic torch passes through San Francisco for its
only North American stop, join me in urging President Bush not
to attend the opening ceremony of the 2008 Beijing Olympics.

Click the link below to tell President Bush to take a stand for
human rights and skip the opening ceremony of the Olympics.

http://action.savedarfur.org/campaign/skip_olympics

China has the power to convince the Sudanese government to
accept deployment of the United Nations-African Union (UNAMID)
peacekeeping forces for Darfur. But instead China remains
Sudan's major weapons provider, largest foreign investor and
trade partner, and diplomatic apologist.

President Bush must not sit quietly and watch the lighting of
the Olympic torch - under the 'one world, one dream' banner -
unless China has used its influence to pressure the Sudanese
government to allow the effective deployment of the UNAMID
peacekeeping force.

We can support the Olympic Games, but we cannot support China's
tolerance for the atrocities being committed in Sudan. Beijing
should not be allowed to bask in the warm glow of peace and
brotherhood associated with the opening games if China is still
underwriting atrocities in Darfur.

Keeping "shoulds" out of dialogue

Did you ever have the experience of someone telling you, “You should do this or that,” but you dismissed it? It won’t work, I already tried it, it’s too easy, it’s too hard, etc. Then on another instance, just talking to someone helped you figure out your own solution that might have been very similar to the original “should” you heard. Is it the first friend who planted a seed? I don’t think so. I think that when we listen carefully without “shoulding” on others, we allow them to find their own solutions.

The other day, I was listening to my friend talk about her financial problems and her life in general. She needed a listener and I was waiting for a meeting to end so happily listened. When she was thirteen years old, her mother died and she went into foster care – a very bumpy ride involving rebellion, eating disorders, unsavory friends, and dropping out of high school. Now in her forties, she has little training other than serving in restaurants and doing nails. But she manages to maintain a positive attitude and a secure life in spite of her low income and lack of skills. At the very end of our conversation, she said, “At least I don’t do drugs and stuff like my mom did.” The next day, I saw her again and she said, “You know, after I got home yesterday, I realized that I use sleeping aids but they make me groggy the next day. Then I have to drink coffee to wake up. Do you think I’m an addict? Now I have to work on getting off this habit.”

The day before, I didn’t cast any "shoulds" on my friend, but due to our conversation, she was able to come to her own conclusions. That demonstrates the power of dialogue, listening, and keeping "shoulds" out of the conversation. When I truly listen to others and allow them to reach their own conclusions, the results are much more satisfying than if I had said over and over again that she should do this or that. She has her life to live and I don’t know what it’s like. All I can be is a mirror helping her to see herself through her own words and actions.

Different world views

World views emanate from individual thinking. We create our environment from our life condition or the thoughts we entertain. When we view the world as good, the world presents itself to us as good. When we view the world as bad, that’s what we see.

I have a friend who emailed me recently after a conversation we witnessed in which four people expressed very different views about Muslims. David related to me that he has been reading about Muslim history and culture and how the Muslim believers behave aggressively toward nonbelievers. He concluded with a list showing “from around the world we hear reports of fanatical Muslim atrocities against their neighbors.”

I find it interesting that David has come to these conclusions from his reading whereas I have reached different conclusions. From his reading, he said, “I have not heard of a SINGLE instance of a Muslim being mistreated in the United States.” In the Jan. 22, 2008 installment of this blog, I reviewed The Jihad Next Door about how six Muslim US citizens, were treated by the FBI following the 9/11 attack (http://createmorepeaceandjustice.blogspot.com/2008/01/ perils-of-innocence-in-america.html). This book certainly shows how Muslims have been mistreated and how their families live in fear due to intimidation.

Then David said, “Of course, the 'Old Testament' describes a code that is just as harsh and rigid as the worst examples we now see in Sharia. But in the West, only a tiny few try to live by those strictures, whereas a huge population of the Muslim world live under Sharia and seem to want to impose that on the rest of the World.”

Maybe it’s the qualifiers “tiny” and “huge” but it seems to me that Palestinian Arabs and Pakistani Muslims that I know and read about represent the majority of Muslims who wish to live in peace and have much less of a wish to impose their religion on others than do the Christian missionaries throughout the world.

It’s all about context. If I have a certain belief, then I read and talk with people who have similar beliefs. So my view ends up being much different from someone who reads and talks with people whose views are different than mine.

But I choose to believe that the “tiny” factions are those that promote negative causes and the “huge” factions are those that promote positive causes. And I further agree with Dean Carter of Morehouse College who once related that the positive forces are gathering and uniting so that when the current empires grow too large and collapse, these good forces will rise up to take their place. The current recession leads me to believe that a financial empire is about to collapse. Are the positive forces ready to step up?

Help lift others out of poverty

So many ways to take action to help others. One great example is 26 year old Shawn blank who is helping to provide children with education supplies, malaria protection, and water in Bangladesh. You can watch his video here:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=a9IS-3Z5EC4

And I just called my representative to ask for their support for the reauthorization of PEPFAR, America's lifesaving effort to fight AIDS, malaria and TB in the developing world.

You can help by taking action here:

http://one.org/call/signup.html?mode=house&cp_id=20

Thanks!

Tibet - Liberation or Invasion?

With the current crisis in Tibet, John Powers’ book, Introduction to Tibetan Buddhism – Revised Edition offers a timely chronicle of Tibetan history, geography, culture, religion, politics and Buddhist Orders. Powers admits in the preface “the scope of this book is broad … it still only scratches the surface of this ancient and rich culture.” Yes, its hefty 591 pages encompass a broad scope, including beautiful descriptions and details on the uniqueness of the Tibetan people with four appendices and indexes.

Not solely a religious discourse, Powers explains how Tibetan’s spiritual leader, the Dalai Lama, has also served as their political leader in a “priest-patron” relationship ongoing since the fifth Dalai Lama united the country in the 17th century. Although rich in peaceful traditions, the Tibetans lacked defensive arms and strategy against the superior weaponry that the post-World War II Chinese brought to their borders in 1949. “On January 1, 1950, the New Year’s broadcast from Beijing announced that in the coming year the People’s Liberation Army would liberate Tibet from foreign imperialists and reintegrate it with the motherland,” even though it had never been “integrated” in the past.

According to Powers, “It soon became clear that the foreign invaders and their ideology were incompatible with Tibetan culture.” The Dalai Lama tried negotiation with the Chinese but “[b]y 1955, the process of collectivization was underway…Chinese troops began confiscating arms, property, livestock, and possessions, and then they created communes. The people who were being forced into the new system resisted these moves. The Chinese answer was to use violence to force Tibetans into the golden age that awaited them….By 1959 the situation in Tibet was grim….At four o’clock on March 17, the Chinese began lobbing mortar shells in the area around [the Dalai Lama’s summer palace] with the stated purpose of ‘freeing’ the Dalai Lama” from the people surrounding his residence who were trying to protect him. “Late that night he and his party … slipped out undetected and began the long journey in exile to India.”

But before relating these tragic events, Powers provides well-documented research showing why Tibetans exemplify values of nonviolence, peace, compassion, and love for their enemies based on their religious and cultural traditions. Much like the black South Africans, these gentle people suffer at the hands of invaders, and much like boycotts of companies doing business in South Africa, this reader plans to boycott companies doing business in China and lobby Congress to disinvest in Chinese businesses until China agrees to cease its aggressive actions toward Tibet.

John Powers received an M.A. in Indian Philosophy from McMaster University and a Ph.D. in Buddhist Studies from the University of Virginia. A specialist in Indo-Tibetan philosophy and meditation theory, he has published widely on Buddhist thought and practice. He teaches at the Center for Asian Societies and Histories at the Australian National University.

Introduction to Tibetan Buddhism – Revised edition
by John Powers
Snow Lion Publications
PO Box 6483
Ithaca, NY 14851
ISBN-13: 978-1-55939-282-2
$22.95

Change of life changes almost everything

A review:

Although an idyllic setting encompasses the Menopause Ranch, life is less than idyllic for the characters who have been transported there by their spirit guides, Belladonna Morose and her associate, Mea Culpeppa. The guides’ mission is to help each well-drawn character, accompanied by some baggage from her past, recognize how to change herself in order to regain her Zest, the goal she had before she entered adolescence. I identified easily with the characters as they become acquainted with each other and learned about themselves through spirit guides taken from Greek mythology. Vaughn draws her characterizations from real life and they could just as easily be our neighbors, family or friends as she shows their quirky natures and vulnerabilities.

Kimberly, the main character, narrates her experience as a forty-five year old just starting pre-menopause. She is sarcastic, creative, compassionate, and capable of cleaning up other people’s messes. She meets Norma, a child of alcoholic parents, former nun, who runs an antique store near Las Vegas. And Toby, an African-American dancer who gives it to you straight, adding humor to the events of each day at the ranch. They also encounter Beth, a counselor at a mental health center who glides right past a nervous breakdown because there’s too much work for her to stop and take time to care for herself. A little more negativity comes from Jean, a rigid, judgmental business woman and born-again Christian who, while she finds the revelations at Menopause Ranch distressing, can’t wait to get back to her business.

The only confusing element in the book was the way Vaughn changed the point of view from Kimberly telling her story in the first person, to Belladonna and Mea who engaged in conversations about the characters when they weren’t present, but this was a minor distraction that seemed as if it might have been intentional to show that the spirit guides were aware of everything at once, while the guests at the ranch could only see the events from their own perspective.

In their experiences at Menopause Ranch, the women are challenged to transform a life-interfering experience like menopause into a life-challenging opportunity for growth. Included are well-researched facts about drugs, remedies, and attitudes toward menopause. As I read “In Search of Menopause Ranch,” I laughed, I cried, I felt angry, and I felt inspired. I identified with the characters and thought about what I am doing with the rest of my life. Not just for women, even men should read this novel; mid-life crises happen to us all.

The book:
In Search of the Menopause Ranch
Deborah Vaughn
Pisquale Productions
2006
PO Box 3080
Sedona, AZ 86340
ISBN-13: 978-0-97872-330-9
$17.95

Nonviolent solutions

I'm still thinking about China's treatment of the people in Tibet. How does a nonviolent response create a solution? How can unarmed or poorly armed people resist through nonviolence? By creating a counterforce to greed, anger and foolishness. By boycotting goods, stores, commodities produced by the invading force, greed can be swayed nonviolently. By responding with respect, seeing the Buddha nature in others, anger has nothing to retaliate against. By educating people and providing them with science, technology, food, medicine, and shelter - these actions cause the oppressor to appear foolish. What did the Dalai Lama do to earn a Nobel peace prize?

He offered a compromise by suggesting concessions to the Chinese and asking for some concessions for the Tibetans. Most importantly, rather than harboring feelings of animosity, he showed compassion toward the Chinese because of the causes they were making that would impact their lives for many lifetimes to come. Unfortunately the Chinese rejected the offer and no compromise was reached. Being a peace-loving people, the Tibetans have few resources to defend themselves except nonviolent solutions.

The key to nonviolent solutions is to replace anger with compassion, emphasize the reality of the situation to expose foolishness, and offer concessions to satisfy the hungry nature. “A Force More Powerful” a DVD on how nonviolent approaches to conflict result in peaceful solutions can be ordered online. In addition the video game, “A Force More Powerful” teaches players how to outsmart the opposition in ten real-life conflicts.

Nonviolence solutions require wisdom, creativity, and patience, but the outcome means less anger and resentment and a greater likelihood of the participants using nonviolent solutions in the future.

Wake up to reality

I guess it’s not surprising that I’m reading Introduction to Tibetan Buddhism by John Powers at the same time as the ongoing turmoil between Tibet and China. My life seems to attract that kind of synchronicity. There seems to be a similarity between China’s invasion of Tibet and the United States’ invasion of Iraq. Both stem from anger, greed, and foolishness.

In John Powers’ book he relates a tale attributed to Shakyamuni Buddha in which he is asked to explain poverty in the context of his teaching. Shakyamuni states that generosity frees the world of poverty. He explains using a metaphor of a hungry ghost that sees the ocean as dry. It’s not the ocean’s fault; it’s the hungry ghost’s perception that is faulty.

When an invading country, motivated by anger, greed, and foolishness finds itself embroiled in an endless cycle of failure and censure, its perception of its actions is faulty and so it continues to make poor decisions causing harm to its own citizens and the other country’s people. When its leaders gain wisdom, their perception clears, they recognize the reality of the situation, and the conflict ends (Vietnam). My prayer is that both the United States and China wake up to the reality of their actions.

Maintaining unbiased views

I attended a meeting last night where there were two very opposing views. The question under discussion involved whether the media portrays the Muslim Arabs and the Palestinians negatively and the Israelis positively. Does it matter? Why is it important that we treat differing views equally?

Along the same vein, I read that Obama is getting more media attention than Clinton. Why does it matter? It matters only if we trust the media to give us unbiased information.

It could be said that bias is a strategy – a method to plan to get the most out of an opportunity. What is the right move to make in Scrabble? The one that gets the most points now or the one that might get more points later? In the same way, why do we do a cost analysis? To make sure we are making the right investment of time and money.

How important is the media? Do they seriously take the responsibility to report the news without bias? I don’t think so. I’m suspicious that the media reflects the prevailing majority’s attitudes or the prevailing government’s attitudes. Or maybe reflecting the CEO’s beliefs. What about the fifth estate? Do bloggers represent the views of the minority, the dispossessed, the disenfranchised, or their own narrow views?

Who’s right? Who’s wrong? Why do we listen to Point-Counterpoint? Amy Goodman? Rush Limbaugh? Why do some approve of President Bush and some don’t?

Why do some think we should spank and some think we should discipline by depriving children of privileges? Why do some think having a plasma TV is the bomb and others want to bomb plasma TV? Because we all have different views.

What would happen if we all had the same views? We would agree on something that might be way off base – like the world is flat or the earth is the center of the universe. The reason why we have differing views is because no one knows absolutely which view is correct so we must examine all sides of an issue and decide for ourselves.

There are two keys to making a decision. One is allowing dialogue so that all sides can be examined. Only dialogue can expose erroneous views. And the other is allowing free will so that each person can make up his or her own mind. That’s what allows democracies to work. But it also allows people to have wrong or misguided views that may lead democracy in the wrong direction. So the key is to be aware of what the views are and make an informed decision as to which side of an issue one wishes to support.

Theoretically, we hope that the media gives us an unbiased view so that we can see all sides of an issue. But if we acknowledge that the media may be biased, we must choose our media outlets carefully in order to clearly see all sides of an issue.

If we choose a biased media outlet, we choose to adopt a biased view, thus jeopardizing our ability to defend our views on an issue making us vulnerable to misguided beliefs that may be erroneous. Erroneous views corrupt our minds and damage society as we can see by the way TV and movies portray Muslim Arabs or Palestinians as evil and Israelis as good. So if we choose a biased media outlet, then we must also choose one that is biased in the opposite direction and treat the news from each with a clear mind.

If we choose balanced media exposure and view it with an open mind, we may still choose an erroneous view, but at least we have opened up the possibility of seeing the world as it really is with humanity suffering on both sides of the conflict and learning to consider all views as having the potential for truth.

Many in body, one in mind

The Japanese term itai doshin translates to many in body, one in mind. This means that although we are different (many in body) in order to succeed we must be of one mind.

We all look different. We have different facial characteristics, skin colors, body types, cultural cues, and mannerisms - even physical or handicapping conditions. This makes life interesting. This makes us want to get to know another person. If everyone looked exactly the same, we would have to have some other characteristic to tell us apart – maybe scent or feces color. Just think of it – my best friend makes purple poop! My acquaintances create yellow poop! That’s pretty silly and shows how the concept many in body allows us to recognize each other easily.

Now, let’s look at the other side of the equation – one in mind. When we are of one mind with someone, our lives are peaceful. We agree on our goals and work together to achieve them. That’s how we raise healthy children. If both parents agree on the rules and procedures for following the rules, their household is much more peaceful than when the parents are at odds with each other.

Think about people with whom you share one mind – you agree on how things are to be done and accomplish your goals in harmony. List the “rules” you use to communicate, operate, and achieve success. Maybe you have a family conference. Maybe you get together for lunch and discuss your ideas. Most likely you have differences of opinion, but you learn to listen to each other and try to find the best path to move forward.

Now think about people with whom you clash. Your mind is different than theirs. When a plan is made, the other person objects. When the objection is raised, the other person pouts. While the pouting persists, the other person does his or her own thing. When the pouter gets angry, the other person becomes defensive, and on and on. Nothing of substance is accomplished and the ongoing friction rubs people the wrong way on a merry-go-round of unhappiness.

How can we go from different minds to one mind? Using dialogue. When a plan is made, discuss the different factors in the plan. Is this the best location? What if someone is in a wheelchair? How will we accommodate different people? What is our goal? To make sure everyone is comfortable and informed. How can we accomplish that goal? By choosing the right time, the right place and the right people to invite. Once everyone involved in the planning has an opportunity to express their ideas and concerns, the plan becomes one that all can support.

That sounds really nice for planning an event. But what about a really serious issue like divorce, abuse, or suicide? That’s when people’s minds experience real conflict.

I read a book once titled “Can You Wait Until Friday?” about how to respond to someone who is considering suicide. The premise was that when something looks really hopeless, waiting a few days, allows the environment or situation to change demonstrating that the hopelessness is a feeling that is flexible and bound to change in a few hours or a few days. In the meantime, using dialogue to uncover the source of the hopelessness strengthens both people in the discussion and allows them to find unity in a mind dedicated to accomplishing a goal as partners rather than pulling against each other by trying to control or feeling despair.

Remembering the concept “many in body, one in mind” helps us to use dialogue with others in order to maintain harmony and accomplish our goals.

"Who wanted war anyway?"

I just finished reading Cherry Blossoms in Twilight – Memories of a Japanese Girl
by Yaeko Sugama Weldon and Linda E. Austin and published by Moonbridge Publications. (ISBN-13: 978-0-9772323-1-4, Price: $12.95) In it, Yaeko relates her experiences growing up in Japan during the Depression and WWII and explains why many Japanese women married American men during the U.S. occupation as many of the Japanese men had died in the war. After suffering through rationing and air raids, Yaeko says, "Who wanted war anyway?"

As civilian ("collateral damage") continues in the present, not much has changed since Yaeko observed and related the effects of war on her life. A book designed for children, it has much to offer adults who must appreciate the effects of war on civilians in order to take positive action.

Can you hear me now?

When we talk to others, sometimes they aren’t really listening. They have their own agenda and while appearing to pay attention to us, their minds aren’t really focused on our words. We struggle to communicate our point of view, while feeling frustrated when they don’t get it. Something interferes. We blame the TV, the cell phone, the job, the kids, or the chocolate fudge brownies.

What if the interference is somewhere else? Suppose the problem lies in our own behavior? If we want to influence the way another person listens, we need to look beyond our words and responses, beyond the other person’s distractions, and focus on the patterns we have developed in our lives from the remote past. Our inability to communicate with others in this lifetime relates directly to a conflict in the past that sticks to us like bubble gum to the soles of our shoes. We didn’t see it when it happened, but it makes it difficult to move forward.

We don’t know how this conflict appeared, but we can change the way it manifests in the present and the future. By seeking wisdom in this lifetime, we can elevate our life condition and recognize the obstacles to our success. When we discover our responsibility for the relationship, we can walk right through the obstruction in our path and create a dynamic relationship where the other person will sit up and take notice.

We only need one many-faceted tool to create this dynamism – dialogue. When we listen and respond appropriately to the other person, they hear what we said and respond appropriately to us. Learning to use dialogue takes practice, just like giving up complaining takes 21 days according to Rev. Will Bowen. “It’s the length of time, he said, that it takes to break a habit” (Conrads, David. “Stop Complaining.” Christian Science Monitor. 19 Feb. 2008, p. 20). But when we accomplish the task of changing our communication patterns, the reward shows up as happiness in our relationships.

Nurturing and defending freedom

Margarita Drago, a seventh-grade teacher in Argentina, became a political prisoner when she was arrested in 1975. Memory Tracks, Fragments from Prison (1975-1980) recounts her recollections of that time of horror. She offers a moving chronicle of resistance to oppression in Argentina during the US-backed Perón administration.

Without detailing the specifics of abuse, rape, or torture, Drago nevertheless provides the reader with enough information to understand the horror of being a political prisoner. On the other hand, she keeps the reader focused on the encouragement, compassion, hope, and love the prisoners show to each other. She chronicles the way they hoard their bread crusts and sugar to make special desserts for each other, wake up early to prepare maté and toast for breakfast, encourage each other by reciting poetry, recounting movies, and telling stories, write an underground newspaper on tiny scraps of paper, enclosing them in plastic and hiding the documents in vagina or rectum to carry them to their visiting relatives to be published.

Drago relates her first-hand experience of the invincibility of the human spirit in the most degrading situations. Her memoir reminds us of the survivors of the Holocaust and a hint of the conditions currently experienced by prisoners of the Iraq war. Her memories personify the qualities of hope in spite of virtually insurmountable obstacles, courage and strength in unity, and victory over repression, terrorism, and abuse.

This deeply moving account shows how the privileged, controlling factions may assert their strength in an attempt to repress those who disagree with their views, but they fail to subdue their prisoners’ spirits or take away their freedom. All the oppressors do is make themselves look more ridiculous and impotent. The more the oppressors try to control, the more the oppressed gain freedom.

Throughout the book, Drago inserts quotations drawn from diverse sources such as her husband, José de la Rosa and Walt Whitman. One can guess that these were some of what inspired and encouraged Drago and her fellow political prisoners throughout their ordeal and beyond.

Although she still carries the scars of her incarceration, Drago has shown how she has risen above the abuse, deprivation, and insanity of prison and unfurls the banner of liberation for herself and her fellow political prisoners. Drago says, “Sunlight delights me. This sun was my witness, my accomplice, and my companion during the time of my confinement….It invited me to dream. I would close my eyes, throwing my head back, and surrendering to my imagination’s conceits and flights of fancy….How would it feel to live again in a house, entering and leaving without schedule, opening and closing doors and windows, turning on lights, half-drawing curtains closed, and listening to Vivaldi, Bach, The Beatles or Vox Dei?...Always the same questions hovered in my mind: what would it be like to recuperate so many freedoms?”

“Today as sunlight invites me to reflect on what I learned when I hit bottom, I do not want to forget that during war I was able to nurture my freedom and defend it.” Memory Tracks: Fragments from Prison (1975-1980) accomplished this amazing goal.

Margaret A. Ballentine beautifully translated Drago’s memoir and accomplished her own goal “to reproduce in English the crystalline quality of the Spanish prose, to evoke the emotional and physical spaces of this story and to transmit the spirit of the people whose stories this book brings us.”

Title: Memory Tracks: Fragments from Prison (1975-1980)
Author: Margarita Drago
Translator: Margaret A. Ballentine
Publisher: Editorial Campagna
19 West 85th Street
New York, NY 10024
ISBN-13: 978-0-9725611-5-0
List Price: $1495

No guns!

Another campus killing of innocent youth. How do we “challenge and transform the culture of violence” as the announcement below addresses? Why do we think our freedom to bear arms supersedes our freedom to live a long and happy life?

I grew up with guns in my home and they were kept locked up and we used them only when supervised by our parents. We learned gun safety, but none of the five children in my family owns a gun today. I guess we learned that we did not want something that dangerous in our own homes. And we have no need to go “hunting” for wild game.

I realize that many people disagree with my view on gun ownership. I don’t watch TV so I’m not a victim of the sensationalism that makes people feel threatened. I’m not afraid to live in my multi-ethnic neighborhood. I know my neighbors by name. I don’t need a gun to protect myself and perhaps hurt others. I know how to control my emotions, and even though I express my feelings, I use reason to understand my relationships with others.

The announcement below is for a good cause. I think, however, that we need to do much more than this before gun violence moves up from the second-leading to the leading cause of death among young people.

Drum-A-Thon to Benefit Richmond Youth Peace Project (RYPP)
Saturday, March 15, 2008, sunrise to sunset
The Camel
1621 West Broad St.
Richmond, Virginia.
The drum-a-thon will bring together drummers from various traditions to participate in a continuous drum circle. Interested drummers and drumming groups are invited to participate in half-hour time blocks. Anyone wishing to sponsor a half-hour of drumming can download sponsorship information at http://www.rpec.org/.
Gun violence is the second-leading cause of death in the United States for young people ages fifteen through twenty-four. Thousands of Richmond teenagers are affected by violence in their schools and communities. The purpose of RYPP is to challenge and transform the culture of violence in the greater Richmond area through Conflict Resolution Training, Artistic Expression, and Leadership Development.
CONTACT: Ram Bhagat
Email: afrohindu@yahoo.com
Phone: 804-257-9527
Website: http://www.rpec.org/

Managing My Inner Critic

I’m learning more about my inner critic. I have known for years that everyone in my family has a tendency to say something like, “That was stupid of me!” or “I’m stupid!” and I thought that I had conquered that tendency in myself until recently when my daughter, Mary Andrus, told me about a workshop she conducted at an art therapy conference at which she led the participants in listening to their inner critic while doing art.

After hearing about her workshop, I began paying attention once again to the voice in my head that tries to keep me from achieving my goals, whether it is in the area of marketing my books, writing my blog, or painting watercolors. Lo and behold, my critic is alive and well. I’ve been keeping a list of its comments and as you can see below, after my critic speaks, I have a little dialogue with it.

STUPID!
I can’t do it.
Get me outta here!
I’m scared.
I don’t want to do it.
What the !#%! is wrong with me?
Why don’t I just try and see what happens?
I know that I will get a varied reception depending on whom I talk to.
Am I scared that they will bite me?
Am I scared of rejection?
How many rejections must I endure before I give up?
How about 10?
Make 10 calls and then stop.
I’ve done this before. It’s not my first time.
So just do it.

You wimp! You wimplet!
I don’t know how to do this!!
Okay. So do something, maybe make a mistake, and learn how to do it better next time.

So there you have it. A dialogue between my inner critic and me. It's almost like a poem. I am happy to report that once the dialogue reveals itself, I have been able to proceed within a few minutes to up to twenty-four hours for the scarier tasks.

So what does this have to do with peace and justice? Our inner critic sometimes blocks the efforts we would like to make to achieve peace and justice. But by having a dialogue with it, we can get around the blockage and move forward toward achieving our goals.

What inspired me this morning?

I read an article by SGI-USA president, Daisaku Ikeda in which he quotes The Lotus Sutra, the highest teaching of the Buddha. He said, “In the ‘Simile and Parable’ chapter of the Lotus Sutra, it is taught: ‘In that land bodhisattvas will be looked on as a great treasure.’ (The Lotus Sutra, p. 52). The most precious treasure of any land is not its vain celebrities or its arrogant rulers. The supreme treasure is bodhisattvas who work steadfastly for the happiness of others and for peace and justice in the midst of the turbulent and troubled real world. This is all of you. You are these bodhisattvas, the equals of Buddhas, the ‘treasure of treasures,’ protected and praised in lifetime after lifetime…”

What inspired me was the idea that each of us, going about doing whatever we do, when we strive for peace and justice, our efforts are not wasted, ignored, or maligned. No matter what, we are great treasures, making a difference in our families, our communities, our world, and our universe. We can go forth courageously, spreading the message of peace, justice, health, and prosperity for all humanity.

Support the Troops

Support the troops. How many times have you read that on someone’s car and wondered what that means? How does one support the troops? Books for Boots supports the troops by using donations from authors’ royalties to help fund a relative’s trip to visit the hospital where wounded vets are being treated. In addition, publishers donate books to the troops in the hospital to give them something to do while they are healing. By supporting Books for Boots, you can support the troops and at the same time read good books. Go to www.booksforboots.org for more information.

Rescue Fantasies Become Reality

For anyone who has experienced rescue fantasies, Have You Found Her by Janice Erlbaum, a daily journal writer, offers a true story of a rescuer who learns and grows from her experiences. This engaging second memoir of Erlbaum’s, invites readers to investigate her first book, Girlbomb, a story of her own struggles as a teenage runaway.

In Have You Found Her, a non-fiction thriller, Erlbaum relates her efforts to repay a debt of gratitude by volunteering at the same youth shelter that helped her when she was a homeless teen. In the course of her work as the “bead lady” who shows up every Wednesday to teach the girls how to make their own jewelry, she quickly learns to how reach the girls at the shelter. Giving them something to do allows the girls to open up to her at their own pace without Erlbaum becoming intrusive in their lives.

An honest storyteller, Erlbaum shows how she struggles with the shelter’s rules to maintain distance designed to protect the girls and herself from getting too involved in each others’ lives. From the start, she routinely breaks each rule as she becomes more engaged, develops favorites, and soon becomes attached to Samantha (Sam), a girl whose life parallels her own.

A writer who understands that dialogue moves the action along, Erlbaum shows the ups and downs of supporting Sam, being overwhelmed by Sam, being manipulated by Sam, feeling threatened by Sam, having compassion for Sam, and embracing Sam as she struggles with a variety of illnesses including a possible AIDS diagnosis.

At the same time, Erlbaum weaves in her love for Bill, the first man to love her in a humanly healthy way, her own addiction to pot, and her struggles with relationships within her family. Managing all these branches in the story without being sappy or preachy, Erlbaum shows how relationships can grow and thrive.

Using her own ambivalence toward the significant people in her life, Erlbaum chronicles her fear of having honest dialogue with others while demonstrating how her attempts at dialogue keep the relationships healthy and intact.

As Erlbaum builds suspense page by page, the reader must stay engaged to the end to find out who will survive these relationships, and who will ultimately survive as Erlbaum depicts her characters’ metamorphoses from being needy to experiencing autonomy. Although the book gives readers an inside look at the life of a rescuer, it also is a “how-to” for showing how helping others results in personal growth and how relationships grow through compassion, support, mutual understanding, and respect.

Book info: Erlbaum, Janice. Have You Found Her. New York: Villard, 2007. ISBN-13: 978-0-8129-7457-7.

Season for Nonviolence Opening

Today marks the opening of A Season for Nonviolence inspired by the nonviolent actions of Mahatma Ghandi, Dr. Martin Luther King, Jr. and César Chávez. These great men, as ordinary people, at different ages, educational backgrounds, and life conditions, exhibited courageous acts during their lives that inspire us. Gandhi, King and Chávez all practiced nonviolent strategies in order to accomplish virtually insurmountable tasks – Gandhi to free the Indian and South African people from government oppression, King to free the African Americans from social oppression, and Chávez to free the farm workers from economic oppression.
These three men didn’t just create nonviolent resistance from the air. They had many teachings and philosophies that influenced them.
One influence, Henry David Thoreau 19th c. at age 29 was jailed because he protested against slavery by refusing to pay taxes. Gandhi later adopted Thoreau’s views on passive resistance.
Mohandas “Mahatma” Gandhi, a lawyer, (19th c.) When he was thirty-six he called for civil disobedience against repressive government laws in S. Africa. When he was sixty-one, he defied British government’s tax on salt in India by marching more than two hundred miles to the sea to teach Indians how to make their own salt mobilizing millions of Indians to follow his example. Women also influenced Gandhi. He said, “I learned the lesson of nonviolence from my wife.”
Dr. Martin Luther King, Jr, an ordained minister. (20th c.) When he was nineteen, he attended a lecture on the life and teachings of Gandhi. When he was twenty-seven, at the ending of the Montgomery Bus boycott, he taught reconciliation when he said, “As we go back to the buses let us be loving enough to turn an enemy into a friend.” When he was thirty-two, he visited India with his wife to learn about Gandhi. He became convinced that nonviolence is the most powerful tool for social change. He also appreciated the contributions of women to social change. He said, “I am indebted to my wife Coretta, without whose love, sacrifices, and loyalty neither life nor work would bring fulfillment. She has given me words of consolation when I needed them…”
César Chávez, a farm worker, (20th c.) was born on a small farm near Yuma, Arizona that his grandfather homesteaded in the 1880's. At age ten, life began as a migrant farm worker when his father lost the land during the Depression. Together with thousands of displaced families, the Chávez family migrated throughout the Southwest, laboring in fields and vineyards. Chávez left school after the eighth grade to help support his family. When he was twenty-three, Chávez coordinated voter registration drives and battled racial and economic discrimination in California and Arizona following the nonviolent actions exhibited by Gandhi and King.
Hampton Roads Network for Nonviolence sponsors A Season for Nonviolence each year to focus educational and media attention on the philosophy of attaining peace through nonviolent action as demonstrated by Mahatma Gandhi, Dr. Martin Luther King, Jr., and César Chávez. A Season for Nonviolence was co-founded by Arun and Sunanda Gandhi of the M.K. Gandhi Institute for Nonviolence and a group of ten ministers forming the Leadership Council of The Association for Global New Thought. You can find more information about the Season for Nonviolence at their website, www.agnt.org.
No matter the age, education or economic background, Gandhi, King, and Chávez set an example of nonviolent action for us to follow. Robert F. Kennedy (20th c.) summed it up by saying, “It is from numberless diverse acts of courage and belief that human history is shaped. Each time a man stands up for an ideal, or acts to improve the lot of others, or strikes out against injustice, he sends forth a tiny ripple of hope, and crossing each other from a million different centers of energy and daring, those ripples build a current which can sweep down the mightiest walls of oppression and resistance.”
From 19th century philosophers to 21st century ordinary people, the movement for nonviolent social change continues. Each of our efforts, being ripples of hope, will transform our society to one of equality, justice and peace.

Lemons

I read an article by Todd R. Nelson in The Christian Science Monitor about using lemons to help people recognize strength in diversity. Lemons. Lemonade. Lemon meringue pie. Lemon squares. Lemon juice and olive oil to pass gallstones. Lemons all look the same, but upon examining them closely, they each have unique identifiable characteristics. What’s the point? The point is that even though we are all humans, we each have unique, identifiable characteristics. We all look different, but inside each of us is something rare and special.

So how does that relate to dialogue in conflict situations? When we are face-to-face with another person, sometimes we only see the characteristics. Like all lemons are yellow, so we see all men as a certain way or all women as a certain way - or all Jews, or people of color or a particular religion. We respond to them according to our beliefs, rather than to the unique characteristics within them that often elude us.

So we say, “Ugh! That lemon is sour,” or “Ugh! That person is annoying.” When we add a little sugar or oil to the lemon we have lemonade or salad dressing. When we add a little compassion and consideration toward a person, we have a funny, intelligent, courageous person to count as a friend.

The Perils of Innocence in America

Having grown up in suburb of Buffalo next door to Lackawanna and being an advocate for peace and justice, a book about the Lackawanna Six jumped off the shelf into my hands. And once I started reading, I couldn’t put it down. Reading more like a good mystery than the well-researched investigative reporting that it reflected, this book kept me intrigued and reading well past my regular bedtime.

Dina Temple-Raston, National Public Radio’s FBI correspondent and critically acclaimed, award-winning author of several books including Justice in the Grass, In Defense of Our America (with Anthony D. Romero) and A Death in Texas, gave this extraordinary accounting of the lives of six American Muslim twenty-somethings who never in their wildest dreams considered where a trip to Pakistan would lead them.

Temple-Raston created suspense as she sketched the characters, showing their immaturity, restlessness, and strong family ties to their Yemeni heritage. She moved the narrative along with short chapters, action, suspense, and intrigue. Her extensive investigations included traveling to Yemen, Pakistan, and Afghanistan. Knowledge of FBI practices, as well as her ability to gain trust in order to extract information from the most reluctant witness, makes the reader feel like a welcome guest where formerly no one had ever visited.

Temple-Reston painted these alleged terrorists from the perspective of humanity and naiveté. Their travels to Pakistan before 9/11/01 led them to a nightmare during the era after 9/11 when government policies and procedures defied logic and justice. Photos of the six, the neighborhood where they lived, and scenes from Yemen including boys studying at a madrasa added to the interest and authenticity of the book.

The Jihad Next Door – The Lackawanna Six and Rough Justice in the Age of Terror by Dina Temple-Raston
Published in 2007 by PublicAffairs, Special Markets Department, Perseus Books Group, 2300 Chestnut St., Suite 200, Philadelphia, PA 19103
ISBN-10: 1-58648-4036
ISBN-13: 978-1-58648-403-3
List Price: $26.00

I hosted my first house party.

I hosted my first MoveOn house party. Although I felt a little nervous because I didn’t know the people who signed up, I managed to get through the day. I had a hard time concentrating at work, but when I finished, I tidyied up the house in about twenty minutes, said my evening prayers, and fixed my dinner. I thought I felt pretty calm, but laughed at myself when cleaning up the kitchen, I dumped the compost into the recycling bin!

When everything was ready, I sat down to read the paper while I waited. Just then someone knocked on the door. It was Jack, my first and only guest. One guest had called and said she wasn’t feeling well and didn’t want to share whatever she had with us. The other guest cut herself while preparing dinner, but was on her way when a long train at the RR tracks cut her off and she didn’t want to interrupt us after we had already started.

So Jack and I watched the very helpful video, listened to our questions being answered in a webcast and then practiced earning media contacts through giving our pitches. It went very smoothly, we learned a lot about working with the media, and I made a new friend. I’m looking forward to the next opportunity to host a MoveOn house party.

Taking a small leap over fear

Yesterday, I signed up to host a media training party for the Center for Progressive Leadership Action Network. At first I felt like I was sitting on a seesaw arguing with myself.

I thought, “I could do this.”

Then I thought, “No, it will be too much work.”

"Don't be silly. The house is fairly clean. All I have to do is wash the dishes and empty the trash."

Then, "What if someone scary shows up?"

“But it might be fun to meet new people and I could learn about how to talk to the media.”

So I went to the web page and started filling out the application form – a simple name, address, phone number and email address. But I didn’t submit it. I closed the window and went back to my work. But I didn’t delete the email invitation, because I thought I might want to reconsider.

Later that day, I decided that I would do it. I filled out the form, checked it twice to make sure I didn’t omit anything and clicked “Submit.”

Next thing I knew, I received an email inviting me to the training that evening at 9 pm. I had another meeting to go to, but it was supposed to end at 8:30, so I thought I could make it. I got home at 8:56 and dialed the call-in number for the training. After introducing myself and listening to the host, Jeremy, lead the meeting, I felt happy that I had decided to make the commitment and confident that I could host the training for my guests.

Now I’m just waiting for my guests to register and show up on the designated evening.

Easing the Crossing from Life to Death

When I picked up this book in the library, I thought it had to do with communicating with the departed, but I soon realized that this uplifting book focused on the reality of having a final conversation with the dying. After reading it, I found my own conversations changed as a result. Each chapter gently leads the reader to new discoveries about herself and the universality of dying that transcends culture, religious beliefs, and the degree of emotional health found in families and friendships.

Authors Maureen P. Keeley, PhD, and Julie M. Yingling, PhD, both experienced the death of loved ones and related the final conversations that eased them through the pain of these separations. Through their own experience and interviews with others, they investigated the phenomenon of final conversations and produced this encouraging book filled with stories by many people. This book will help others through this difficult transition and provide guidance on how we can facilitate these dialogues with our dying friends and relatives.

Keeley and Yingling acknowledge that our experiences with death and dying have changed in the last century since medical advances and specialized care means that most people will die in the hospital rather than at home. This prevents us from learning about death and dying in a natural setting as we grow up. We have lost the learning experiences that could have taught us how to talk to loved-ones in the final months or hours. Final Conversations: Helping the Living and the Dying Talk to Each Other provides us with the examples we need to challenge our fears and develop the courage to face the dying with love, compassion, and even forgiveness.

Keeley and Yingling, both instructors in communication for over forty-five combined years, interviewed scores of people to collect their stories of their final conversations. Mothers, children, spouses, grandchildren, and friends of the dying contributed their stories of their own personal transformation through final conversations in an effort to help others discover ways to communicate that lead to peace, reconciliation, and love.

In my own experience, my father died when I was nineteen while I was away at college. This traumatic event led to a lasting depression that I struggled with for years. Just reading this book enabled me to remember the time a month before he died when my dad came to visit me during parents’ weekend and took me soaring on a glider. I realized as I read this book that we had a nonverbal final conversation that I thought I had missed. At the end of that perfect day, my dad, who was not a demonstrative person, pulled up in front of my dorm and stopped the car. He looked straight ahead, pipe in his mouth, waiting for me to get out of the car. I looked at him, took the pipe out of his mouth and kissed him goodbye. Now I understand that this was our final conversation. His gift to me was the time we spent together. My gift to him was the kiss.

Presently, my eighty-seven year old mother is vigorous and active, but I realize that every time I see her, it may be the last. Often I struggle with knowing what to say to her or how to react to her sometimes-prickly criticism of me. Yesterday, after reading Final Conversations: Helping the Living and the Dying Talk to Each Other, I went to visit her and reminded myself to “Pay attention!” We had a lovely time together visiting, reminiscing and enjoying each other’s company. Reading this book enabled me to treasure the precious moments with my mother rather than getting mired in the petty irritations that have no relation to the big picture of our love for each other.

So whether someone is struggling with a loved one’s impending death or losses that have occurred in the past, this gentle book will guide them through the experience with suggestions on how to create an opportunity to have a conversation, overcome angry feelings from the past, or simply embrace the dying and help them cross to the other side.

Book info: Keeley, Maureen P., PhD, and Julie M. Yingling, PhD. Final Conversations: Helping the Living and the Dying Talk to Each Other. Acton, MA, VanderWyk and Burnham, 2007.